Then why don't you say "Wife, I cannot listen to any more of your berating me tonight. In light of the fact that you have decided that you will not try to meet my needs, I am done having this conversation with you. I love you but until there is some equity in this marriage, I will not be participating in any conversations that center around my failures."
Then go do something fun for yourself.
You voluntarily have given all your power to this woman and then you sit back and wonder why you are so unhappy. Take some of it back and stop placating her. It's not workin anyway.
