I want to say that I really, REALLY appreciate your comments, insights and observations.
Accept your W - I do accept my W. I accept her feelings. I just don't accept her A.
trust her - This is a tough one. Can you expound on what you mean by trust? W is involved in an A w/OM. They've gone away on weekend get-aways and a week long vacation to the Caribbean. Yes, I trust that her feelings are real and she is acting on them.
believe her pain when she only focusses on the negatives - I'd never deny her feelings. I do have a hard time beleiving that she is truely and deeply happy as she says she is, but I would never express that to her.
Let her speak about the pain, listen, accept and acknowledge that anything she says was painful, was painful - She doesn't speak or write about it. We are in the past and she has moved on. It's over and done with and there is nothing more to talk about. And I agree, I don't want to go back to that R. It was too stressful, too closed.
She'll let the past M go Can I tell her that I left go of the past and hope that she does too?
This is'nt so easy because it's YOUR heart that has to change first. My heart has changed. For the past 3 years, I was a doormat. I've recently begun to set up some boundries. I don't want to go back to where we were before. I want to have the courage to say, "Hey, something isn't right between you and I, what's up?" and then sit and listen with empathy.
