Most interactions that are difficult with your H come down to one thing. And I see in your H much of the same behavior I saw in my H. In your H's eyes it is all about him wanting to have a say and have that be respected. He doesn't want to feel controlled by you. I realize that you are not trying to control, and are making every effort to be reasonable, compromise, etc. But if it is like my H, he got to a point where he just decided he was taking a firm stand and wouldn't let me boss him around in any way, even if it was only in his mind. Your H is acting out against feeling controlled. And this is his perspective, even if it isn't entirely accurate. I think this may be a part of the core issue going on beneath it all and something to work on in MC. My H even admitted to me that he would fight against anything he interpreted to be giving in to my way, regardless if I was being reasonable or not, simply because he didn't want to do that anymore. I don't think this has to be your H's long-term perception, but it is his perception right now. And there is likely some truth to it. So now he is responding by going overboard with rebelling against that. It will take some time, but I do not think this is an issue that cannot be overcome. Your H and you are not a team anymore. It's about control and one of you "winning" and I def. recognize that stand-off behavior that results. So work with your C to find out how you can start to change that dynamic.
