Sorry all. I have not been able to post much in the past few days. First, everything is as ok as it can be with a family member facing a court date for DUI. In short, my W has hit rock bottom and she knows it. I don't know how that will affect us, but I have done my part in being supportive, validating and NOT trying to fix her through this. I feel really good about how I handled things. I wanted to yell and scream at her for doing this to our family but I did nothing of the sort. I did not bring up her drinking. Actually, for the first time ever, SHE did, saying she wanted to go to the doctor and possible get a sleep aid so she didn't have to drink at night to sleep. It's an excuse for sure but she clearly said she wants to change her drinking habit. Sure, it looks like she's trying to replace one addiction with another but it is a step to go to a professional and ask for help. Also, we have been having deep conversations over the past few days since this. She seems (and I say SEEMS purpously because the reality is that she thinks she needs me right now and could be saying anything to further that) to understand what she's been doing and is remorseful about it. She's apologized several times for putting me through all this on top of what she's been putting me through the last month. I won't lie. It has been really nice to have contact, both physically and emotionally with my W again. She was open to me hugging her, and even walked around in front of me nude (she has not done that in a LONG time). She seems really comfortable with me. All that said, I am still guarded. It was me of course who most recently pointed out that us DBing LBS's crumble in the face of positivity. I am determined not to do that. I love this change in her but I think it could be just as easily motivated by trauma and desperation as true change of heart. Who knows. I am living this day as a new day and we'll see what comes. Until the OM is gone, and she demonstrates that to me, then nothing is "Ok" but it IS better and that's all I can ask for right now. I will post much more over the next day or two. Thank you for caring and I will try to catch up on your sitch's asap.
