a) hard to believe for your W that it's for real and for good, it's only been a month after all, not to mention that you guys seem to quite frequently take fight breaks with snooping and interrogating
I don't quite know what this means. The first part makes sense and I realize the time frame here is short. The second part about frequent fight breaks. I think there have been 4 R talks/fights/interrogating incidents since she dropped the bombs over a month ago. One a week seems fairly infrequent to me. Maybe I am wrong. In any event, your point is well taken if not all the way understood.
b) she is able to feel that although you're not angry outside and get along pleasantly, are still mad and desperate inside and feel that you're entitled to demand her affections and she that drops everything and be what you want her to be.
Ok, I agree with this too. Sure thing. Gee, she's still seeing someone else while playing happy home with me. Can't imagine why there would be some underlying tension. I don't expect or demand she drop anything except her boyfriend. If that is controlling and too much to expect then oh well. At some point she will have to do this if we have any hope to reconcile. That all said, the difference between me now and 3 months ago, 5 years ago, etc is night and day. For most of our R I could NEVER let something go, and I mean for 5 minutes, not 5 days. I could never stop talking about something until it was "finished". BIG mistake. I do not do that now. Of course, see a). It's only been a few weeks so...
I get what you are saying. The changes are too new to really expect her to do a "180" of her own, and maybe they are somewhat transparent to the extent that I have not been able to fully commit to some of them. Is that about right?
