I do not go to a counselor or thearapist. I haven't found a program in my area that offers that service cheap or even free! I don't have the money to go myself.
It definately needs to stop right now! It's starting to trickle over into my progress with my H. He called this morning and we spent 30 minutes fighting. Because I don't know how to stand up for myself so I actually take it over onto him. I actually (without realizing it) tried to start a fight with him today just to get some of my anger out. Of course he's mad about it because he's scared that this extra stress is going to make me lose the baby and he gets sick of me being mean at him because I'm really mad at her. I want to tell her but for some reason my brain won't let the words come out of my mouth. I'm unsure how to approach it calmly . . I mean what do I say, "I hate your boytoy . . I think he's annoying and I don't want him around so much??" I think I may just try to change my prospective on things and not be so angry and see if it helps my situation at home. Maybe then it'll help my progress with the R.
I'm so frustraighted with myself. I keep doing stupid things that could really screw up this R as it's still in this tender stage. I'm just not sure exactly what to do to fix things. I'm going to try to come up with goals as to how to fix my situation with Emily-2 before it goes to far and I end up wrecking my marriage and losing a friend.
