To be honest I thought that was what I was doing, his reaction seemed off the wall and I tried to calm it down and make it clear to him that I wasn't being grasping, just trying to think of sensible ways to manage our joint finances. When you write a letter, there is no give and take, no body language to soften the statement In the past I would have agreed with you here, but these days Chromo he takes my body language and tone of voice to be negative no matter how hard I try to soften it. If he perceives it as soft he perceives it as me manipulating the situation to my favour. He has in fact reacted better than I expected to written communications in the past. The words are not laden with tones, and there is no body language so he just gets the words and deals with them the way he wants.
thanks for your input though.
Fran
if we can be sufficient to ourselves, we need fear no entangling webs Erica Jong
