CeMar, you posed some good questions and it would be interesting to see how others answered them as well as I am finding it mighty hard to answer them now I have to think about it.
Okay, this is what I have come up with after 20 minutes, not good. We do stuff for each other, whether it be something nice and spontaneous like buying a small gift while out grocery shopping or just cooking dinner, and not expecting anything in return. Something that will make the other person happy.
In reply to GEL regarding a MC. We did see one individually for a session each, but aside from being unable to get a babysitter and me working the days she is available - I didn't like her much! We have yet to find another.
Chrissy, you are right about it being so much more about sex. I do know this but it is so hard to get rid of those negative feelings about the whole thing. All those times I laid there hating my husband for having sex with me when he knew I wasn't into it has taken a toll. It made me see sex as just an act of gratification. I just stopped doing it at all. Now he has come to his senses about our relationship and recognised his wrongdoings (he abused me physically a few times and mentally many times over the low sex drive thing) I'm supposed to just forget the bad things and put a whole new spin on things? I really wish it was that easy! I really, really do! It is happening slowly, and that is the part my husband is having trouble with. I'm trying hard, but when he gets pissy over it it's like taking another step backward.
Argh, I have to stop, I don't want to think anymore...
It can't come quickly enough
And now you've spent your life
Waiting for this moment
And when you finally saw it come
It passed you by and left you so defeated.
Scissor Sisters - 'It Can't Come Quickly Enough'
