I see what you are saying. And I agree about the selfishness thing. My H is being ridiculously selfish, and it really hurts. I keep reminding myself that it is his own issues, not a personal attack, and that the lying and anger come from guilt. At least he has guilt right? It could be worse!! I don't think I would hesitate to date someone IF someone came along that I found interesting / attractive, cuz I do think it could help me to detach, and help him see what he could lose. However, I have learned my lesson about trying to MAKE him jealous - so I would only do it if I really wanted to ,for me, and would not make a point of H knowing or anything manipulative like that. That is the point of GAL right? To live for you, not what your H wants or needs. I just wish there was an instruction manual on how to actually DO This, cuz I understand it totally but getting it from my head into my heart seems to be a dilemma. Oh yeah, OW's D actually makes me more sad than OW just b/c it scares me to think how that will look to my own D if / when she becomes more exposed to OW. Also I look at my D and think MY GOD how could he choose to spend time with that kid over our own beautiful baby?!!??! (Nothing against the kid, ofcourse) I also feel bad for my stepdaughter ,9, b/c he has the OW and her kid around her every other weekend on his visitation, right from the beginning, with no regard for her feelings at all. God - why do I even want this man? I suddenly just felt so ANGRY at him! I have never liked my SD's mother but my H's aunt told me that she has tried repeatedly to tell him that my SD needs time alone with him and that she doesn't want OW and kid around her but he ignores her, and even though I am glad that he has so far been keeping his promise to me, it seems sh*tty that he won't respect SD's mom's wishes, if not for her mom than for SD. That tells me that he doesn't GET IT, and that he is only complying with ME b/c he likes me now - so what happens when he decides I am being a b*tch and he doesn't need to honor my wishes?!?! He really needs to grow up soon. I am so scared that my D is gonna end up hurt by him for the rest of her life if he doesn't.... Sorry if I digressed but I just got myself all worked up! I am livid with him right now!!!!!!!!!!!11
