I'm curious...you've probably already said this to him, but could you tell me if you have said the following? "I'd almost prefer if he'd say, "You know, I'm so wrapped up right now in my own stuff that I doubt I will be much good to you these next weeks. Please have patience with me"
Have you literally told him you'd prefer him to tell you this than behave the way he is?
Something you just said caught my eye too (you're probably gonna get irritated with me). You said...."What I don't seem to have tolerance for is someone getting my hopes up and then not following through with it." But Honeypot....the someone getting your hopes up isn't him, it's you. There's nothing wrong with feeling encouraged by the situation....but I feel you aren't giving him room to stumble.
Now the shame card...that'd get to me too I must admit. I think you handled that one perfectly. If my H had made that comment to me I'm sure I would have said something about being callouse and insensitive towards me, especially right now when you yourself are dealing with a plate load of crap yourself.
I think the way I look at my R with my H is that I know...no matter where we are at in our R there are going to be problems of some sort, kids, family, R, Sex...whatever. If we don't have some type of problem...I'm going to chalk it up to a bonus period in our lives and document it on a calendar somewhere for posterity LOL.
Really...I think it's a matter of things leveling at your home with everything that's going on.
