There is no question you two still love each other. That will always be there. I think every situation has hope and a lots of it. After doing this DBing for so long, I can look into people's situations and think, "oooohhh, if you just did this and not that."
It is all so hard to grasp though even if people have it spelled out for them. It goes against what we think we should do and everything we have been taught. However, once you do this DBing stuff long enough, it becomes a way of life and a much healthier one.
I know the situation with your wife is very, very difficult. So much trust has been hurt and things turned out like you would never have expected. Marriages can survive this sort of thing though.
Hang in there. There is a guy on here named MF. He is from a long time ago. His wife had an affair and he went through a lot of the emotions you are describing. I will find that for you too. He also read a book that he highly recommended. People who have read it seemed to like it. I'll find the name of that book too. It's for men instead of women so I didn't read it. I haven't a clue what it is about.
