Quote: I have had this uneasiness about things...I guess it is that nothing has gone forward and I am wondering if it ever will or if I am not being patient enough to let her realize things can be better??? Or is it because it will never get better?
Yes, I had that feeling quite a bit. But things didn't turn around when I had that anxiety about what she was thinking, doing, or intending to do. It was when I had given up and didn't care very much what she was doing. Frank, I moved on. I was dating. I enjoyed spending time with my boys, with other women, and with friends. I stopped asking her to do things together. I still spoke to her like a friend, but I didn't actively seek interactions with her. Emotionally you aren't where I was at....you still are so tied into her and I would bet that she senses it. It was AFTER I quit having those emotions that you are having now that she wanted to try again. Sure, I thought about her, but I looked forward to time away from her as much as time with her. You need to be patient with her and with yourself. Allow yourself the time to work through your feelings and heal. You can't start a relationship with anyone, not even your XW, until you are a little more whole. I personally think it's better to consider that you'll never be with your XW again and act accordingly. Be her friend, but forget about having a marriage to her again. She needs to work through her baggage and decide if she wants to try again with you. Maybe by that time you can decide if you want to give her another chance.
In the end, it's not the years in your life that count. It's the life in your years. Abraham Lincoln
It is hard to fail, but it is worse never to have tried to succeed. Theodore Roosevelt
