Quote: You see that is where I am letting her have a hold on me. I want a relationship that is caring and would love it to be with her; but to move forward in that regard is not easy either; because, as I said it is not fair to that other person.
This I definitely understand and I sympathize. I struggle/struggled with this too. My feeling is that this is a useful time to get used to having no one fulfill that need. I don't know about you, but I found my time was pretty much used up between visitation, housework, some sports, the gym, etc. I enjoyed having a night or two where all I did was veg out in front of the tube having a beer. Dating actually added a dimension of added stress and getting to know someone that frankly did nothing for me to relieve the feeling of wanting someone to be a "couple" with. Another woman is anything but a quick fix. I'm suggesting trying to find a comfort level on your own, with male friends, and with activities that you enjoy. Remember, some of that stuff may go on the wayside if you get back together with your X (or are with some other woman) so you probably should take advantage of it. I suspect that if you polled the people on here, you would get a lot of people wanting the same thing. Remember when you were married there were probably times you looked at single friends and at least thought it would be nice to have the flexibility to pick up and leave at a moments notice or not have to discuss your nights plans with anyone.
In the end, it's not the years in your life that count. It's the life in your years. Abraham Lincoln
It is hard to fail, but it is worse never to have tried to succeed. Theodore Roosevelt
