Had a good day today with H. He is going away working so we will not see him now for 3 weeks. He said he was going to miss me. We had a chat this morning about our situ. He brought it up!! Kind of went over same thing, but I do kind of understand a bit more what he is saying. He has 3 mains issues he has to face before he can commit to be again:
1 - he feels happy or happier now than he did when he thinks back to the last few months we were together and he is scared to committing and going back to having the unhappy feelings again.
2 - he is scared to face up to his jealous feelings over my Bfriend.
3 - He is scared to give up seeing OW as these give him an escape, and help him forget any jealous feelings he has about my situ.
I said to him that we would not work unless both of us tried. He agreed but said he thinks the best way is to take things slowly, and let them happen naturally until the day comes when he can say to himself that alot of the above are not issues for him anymore. I said to him that this could take months/years and that it may never happen. I also asked him if he fel like this then why did he instigate me and him trying again?? He said it was becuase after 2 years of being split up there was obviously some really strong bond between us, and love still there... He also said to me that ' your boyfriend might love you, but he will never love you as much as i do'....
Think he just felt a bit sentimental as he is going away for 3 weeks......
So really non the wiser.. My honest opinion is I need to do what I feel deep down is right. I do still believe my marriage can work and be happy, I do think that I have to end relationship with my Bfriend. I do think that I have to re-start DBing again with my H.
I no its going to be hard but I think if I stay strong and do not pursue and keep my own life at priority I do believe there is a chance...
