Dear Rob,

I had a good laugh over your "EEWWW" reaction looking back! Definitely great medicine, laughter! Thanks!

I wonder about Firedragon's karma thoughts regarding life lessons. I bet you're being asked to TOTALLY put yourself in your W's shoes because...you've BEEN there! You KNOW what it's like and therefore you've kind of answered your own question about what she feels for OM and why. The A means NOTHING and you have the opportunity to bring the two of you back together by your responses! If you could allow yourself to get out of the "Game On" mode, you might find a way to get progress instead of payback. What's that old chestnut (I think another bloody Dr. Phil-ism) but would you rather be RIGHT (getting back at her) or HAPPY (finding another way to respond so that she has room to respond differently, too)? Believe me, as a woman I would totally shut down if my H was doing a "Game On" to me! It would be better if you found a way to soften up (this is a show of strength, not weakness!) and respond without showing anger.

Having said that, we've all have our Achille' heels, I gottcha...mine is guilt, maybe yours is anger. Lord knows, we have plenty of opportunity in these horrible circumstances to face our demons/guilt/anger issues and get beyond them. Part of OUR LBS Karma perhaps.

Thanks for you support with regard to my sitch Sigh. My husband is really, truly an alien. But he did call today to give me his hotel #. I'm grateful he was considerate in doing so. Tomorrow is our 11th wedding annivesary. Sigh. I told him I would be thinkging of him tomorrow not even saying WHY (he knew) and he said he would be thinking of me, too. Then I got off the phone quickly.

I have been totally quiet on this end when he's been out of town and was staying away from him as much as possible before he left - even, as I said earlier, going to a hotel when I honestly couldn't take it anymore. I have no idea what's going on in his head. He left me a HUGE 5 minute message on my cell phone two days ago. A launry list of things he's been doing (proving he's having a great time away?) but also like his usual way of sharing. I guess all I can do is make no effort to call him. What do you all think about this tactic, recalling, if you will, that I have not sent him any Plan B-type letter....yet!

Thanks!
Love,
Kaly