I know you've said before but I've forgotten. What was your betrayl?
It's amazing how much your H sounds like mine. Just before my H's dad died I was on a cross-country trip with my sister. I was pissed off at him for going on a trip to NYC with a friend of his and doing things I didn't approve of so when he called me I didn't respond.
Well, as it turns out, his dad had taken a turn for the worse and he really needed me. Unfortunately I didn't know how important it was to him and I was in the middle of Wyoming with minimal cell reception.
In so many arguments he brings this up again and again as an example as to how I wasn't there for him. When I checked our cell phone records I discovered that mere days after this was his first call to OW#1.
I don't know what to tell you. All I can say is we both just gradually have to build up their trust in us. Maybe we both need to ask our Hs what we can do to build that trust. Of course that could just push them away further.
I guess the best thing to do is just to take things slowly.
