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So where does that leave us? I have liked your "overquoting" to this point, but what does this one mean? She is going to bolt after this because it's too much to try and fix her damage?



It means the marriage in all likelihood was not awful prior to the affair, even for your W;
so don't let her convince you in this.
She's just rewriting your past to make her case plausible - that she had to find an outlet in an affair because the M was awful.
IT WAS NOT.
Therefore, it's not your fault, although you could have and still can be a better spouse.
Your W is trying to escape the unpleasant reality; but you're the one who can think straight now, and maintain your belief in your M and that there was nothing truly unsolvable in it. And still there isn't.
Unfortunately, the job is up to you now.
The again, you're the one with the brain

To get through the darkest period of the night, act as if it is already morning. The Talmud