Quote: That is a DRAMATIC change in me. I would talk something to death for hours if my W would stay in the room and take it
This was me to a tee...I used to actually get into work late almost everyday because I had the need to talk about an issue before I went to work....recognize that W just worked an overnight shift and obviously wasn't in the mood for a talk, but darnit, if I didn't want to talk!
I think, and NYS may be able chime in here, that this IS a crucial thing to recognize.
Quote: Oh well, agree with her feelings, don't argue and validate. Rinse and repeat.
Sometimes its hard to agree with those feelings when they seem so irrational...but that's part of validation. They are THEIR feelings, not ours and because they are unique, special people, those feelings have merit. If you haven't already, you should try to get the book I Don't Have to Make Everything All Better. I have started to utilize some of those principles in there with my D's and its pretty amazing the result you can get. Of course, it will take practice to employ those principles everyday, but it really is an eye opener.
"Achieve success, but without vanity; Achieve success, but without aggression; Achieve success, but without gain; Achieve success, but without force." Lao Tzu
