I really feel your pain. I’m so sorry you don’t recognize your husband anymore. Trust me, you are not alone. I, too, am 2 years older than my H. but we do not have children. It does sound like your H. has a lot of maturing to do emotionally before he could be able to be in a healthy relationship again. (Again, this is how I feel about my H. too). I am beginning to think my H. is not going to be capable of it for a very long time. He, too, has o.w. My best advice to you would be to read the DB’ing books and try to detach from this. I realize that is very hard when you have children involved. They say that the affairs don’t last, and that’s speaking generally. My H. has been carrying on his for 10 mo. You could talk to a lawyer (free consult) and get an idea of your entitlements, if you think that would make you feel better. I did this, so I could be prepared, just in case. Don’t make any decisions when you are emotional. It’s best to wait until you are calm and have really thought it through. Keep posting; I’ll check back. Many hugs, Hope
Most of us really marry only once. First love endures, even unto our dying day. And we never really divorce.
