Hanging on/The Long Haul #8

[WCW]

Thanks again, Kiwi. You are not overstepping any bounds, I always appreciate your straight forwardness.

I run in streaks, (no-that's not streaking!) and right now my streak is all these memory triggers that keep popping up. Someone sent me a joke, and it referred to a town in Wyoming, and that town happened to be one that was an old memory that H told me about, a relationship he had prior to me. And again, I drift off, and by the time I come back to reality I've faced a lot of demons. It's hard to get back to task at hand. Not all those memories bring up anger, some do. Sometimes I let go of it better than others. What I need is a big hug, arms wrapped around me, and I just want to be held for a while. That would go so far in regaining my PMA. But such a simple thing is not doable for my H, so I have to find another way, and I will. I know that I cannot count on H to help me with that. I do hope that he doesn't hinder my PMA, I know he can do that too.

Probably another thing in the back of my mind is an event we have this weekend, and it is very possible OWB will be there as well. In my current state of mind I don't think I am well prepared to deal with it, but I will anyway if I need to. And I will do it well! Got any kickboxing pointers for me?

In addition to that event, is my annual work party. I have yet to mention it to H. I'm pretty sure he saw the signs posted when he stopped in the last time or two. But I still have to confirm if he will be my 'date'. If not, I will still go. Free food, and I've gone solo before.

95/5, I need to categorize.