Lan:

Well. That explains A LOT. Jesus. I feel like I've found my clone.

Tap, tap, tap, tap.....

Welp, I suppose we have to decide if we want to continue this conversation here or through email... which would you prefer?

I'm at corri@ftio.com if you'd like to email me.

Got LOTS of things for you to think about and consider, but my time here is very limited.

You have to realize that even though you don't 'own' your parents behaviors (good) on an intellectual level... the residue of their behaviors linger deep within. They affect you on a subsconscious level.... and this causes great confusion... which you ARE experiencing.

I will reiterate again, your xH and what you've got going with him... isn't the biggest issue at the moment. I'd take the advice given to you here by Stig and Blackfoot to keep things sane and peaceful... but I wouldn't 'leave' or attempt to 'ramp' up the R until you have a firmer grasp of why/how you are doing the things you do. Once your confusion has cleared, you will know EXACTLY what you would/could/should do...

Lemme no.

Corri