Hi, and thanks for taking the time to post your story. I benefit from reading how others have handled similar situations...and it sure helps knowing I'm not alone.
It stung to know I was unfairly scrutinized by him in his confused and alien state. Yes, I know this feeling. I didn't even know what was happening until it had already happened.
These wa's are so confused and looking for some kind of divine moment of truth that's just not realistic. I agree. I have no idea what kind of sign H. was expecting, but he didn't seem to find it so he's being firm with me about it being over.
There doesn't seem to be much I can do, except leave him alone right now, and see in time if he really is going to stand by his words. I do agree with him, it was uncomfortable off and on, when he was here the other night. But I'm wise enough to understand why: we have rarely spent any time with each other in months, and you can't just expect everything to feel familiar in a matter of hours. I think he honestly believes that is how it should be, and if it's not, he's taking that as justification for not coming back. I realize how much work it would take to build a new R. with him; he thinks it should magically happen instantaneously.
Most of us really marry only once. First love endures, even unto our dying day. And we never really divorce.
