Too much of my self esteem was coming from her. I DID get too much of my own 'self worth' from our old relationship.
Frank, I'm not saying anything you don't already know. Just helping to remind... Self-identity needs to come from within. We don't NEED W to make us 'happy'. We become 'happy' [better to say, content with life and ourselves] by virtue of who we ARE as an individual. Its a process of redirecting our source of self-worth and importance to OURSELVES and away from what other/W says/does or doesn't say/do. Recognize the accomplishments and changes you've made in yourself Frank. Take pride in who you've become! I know a lot of people here would agree.
Being able to not let HER feelings and actions influence MY feelings.
Exactly, getting to the point of governing OUR behavior regardless of what W does/doesn't say/do. Feelings are so fickle and its way too easy to make decisions and choices based on them. We are all so easily swayed by how we feel at a given point in time and respond accordingly. A level-head and sound mind offers solid-er/higher ground and helps resist knee-jerk reactions to emotions/feelings. Oh, patience helps too. Patience with yourself, with W and sitch. I know, hard to do all the time. How about most of the time?
Sorry for the sermon. I am so there for you Frank.
