Say, I want to comment on the anger issue, as it was something I experienced to an extent after H decided he want to recommit to our R after our son was born. In my recent post, I detail some of the issues I dealt with after H came back into my life then.... and anger/resentment was one of them.
I think one of my problems back then was I didn't form any boundaries w/H. I was just so happy- and relieved- to have him back in my life, that I was too scared to say anything or do anything that might upset him. Was afraid he might leave me again, accuse me of all the same old thing.... So when he continued to live his life in a semi-bachlelor state- going out a lot, drinking, spending lots of money- I grew resentful; resentful of him for what he was doing, for not meeting my needs, but also resentful and angry at myself for not having the courage to speak up, voice my dissatisfaction, and set some boundaries at home. And with time, b/c of all those feelings, I began to "react" to H, instead of setting healthy boundaries for me and for our R, which has made things worse... It has helped contribute to where H and I are today, about 4 years later, and I would hate for you to experience what I have experienced.
So don't keep that anger and resentment in. Set boundaries, if you need to set boundaries. Tell H what specific actions he can take to reassure you and make you comfortable in your "new" R. Just don't let the anger/resentment fester until it explode; get it out, but get it out in a constructive manner. I never did, and it's been quite destructive to my R.
Just me 2 cents...
PetiteFlower
Quote: Follow Your Bliss
~Joseph Campbell
