Well I am so far from DB right now... I hope people at least learn one thing from me and that is what not to do!
Why would anyone express a silver lining benefit to others over being the "poster boy" of what not to do, as if there's no avoiding their actions, when it's totally in their power NOT to be the "bad example" in the first place, I ask myself?
In other words, why would someone who can make a choice to act otherwise, and has the tools at hand to implement that choice, instead justify, to some measure, their current conduct?
Tim, question for you to ponder: Is it really that you're unable somehow to have control over yourself and give so much control over yourself to your W, which I don't believe to be the case, or is it perhaps that deep down tucked away all hidden somewhere, is a fear that if you did do the "right things", that she might come back - and you're fearful therefore that she'd hurt you again? And so, you unconsciously sabotage, acting in ways therefore that practically guarantee the death of the relationship? Ask your C to help you examine that.
