Please take it from someone who has been there, she has to walk this walk out for herself. You may or may not still want her when she's done but you can not do anything to expedite this process. I'm so sorry you're going through this hell. The only thing you can do is take care of yourself and your kids.
Nothing is going to open her eyes until she smacks her rear end on rock bottom.
Another thought: DO NOT be her "babysitter". Make plans to be gone a lot in the evenings if you have to but don't let her add insult to injury by leaving you with the kids while she is galavanting around town with OM.
