I'm in a really difficult situation. One night right before Thanksgiving my wife was trying to take our 8 kids (yes, that's eight) away to her in-laws against my will...just 30 minutes following a conversation in which she agreed to stay with me for the holiday.
Frustrated, angry, and nervous...I did the only non-violent thing I could think of to keep my family home with me. (since we've been having problems, its very uncomfortable visiting with her family). What I did was let the air out of the back tire in the family truck. She called 911 from inside the car. The police came. I was arrested, and they placed an "A" level restraining order on me.
I cannot talk with my wife at all. I cannot send her an email. i cannot send her a letter. I cannot use a third party to communicate with her. If I do any of these things, I could go to jail and be charged with a felony if she were to go to the police again.
While this charge was pending, she went ahead and filed for a divorce in the county court. When I had a hearing in town court, the judge refused to act on the restraining order because the county court had already granted her full custody and use of our house. He didn't want to 'go over' the higher court and drop my restraining order. Both my wife and I took the stand on December 23rd, two days before Christmas, but, this town judge didn't listen to any of the testimony. I have been living in hotels and at friends places ever since two days before Thanksgiving.
My oldest children are 12 and 11 years old. They often call me to arrange to spend time with me. Often they'll bring some of the younger children along too. My wife has been very liberal in my visitation, probably because watching 8 children herself is a HUGE job. Still, I miss her and living with my entire familiy.
My kids have told me that their Mom has said - "I would let Dad come home if he'd only say he's sorry and admit that he's wrong" - I obviously don't know if this is true, but, it has given me some hope. However, I have no way of telling her anything because of the restraining order. Also, as one would expect, our hearing brought some mud slinging with it (I was desperately trying to get back home, she was trying to keep me out)...so her perception is probably that I'm not regretful at all. In fact, I am. I know I can be a better father and a better husband. I'm just hoping for another chance.
Does anyone have any suggestions for me? It would be greatly appreciated.
Hi DougW. Not to make light of your situation, but how do you get nine people in one truck? And my next question, why do you get a restraining order for letting air out of your own tire?
You can't contact your W, but you hear thru your kids about your wife, and she wants an apology. How about dropping a hint back to your W thru the kids? is there a little crack there to see some light?
Live your life while you are still living. Riding the trail less traveled.
