the book that helped me is "he's scared, she scared". also about the commitment phob. I have to admit it didn't give me a lot of hope
Vince, when I recommended that book to you, which by the way are by the same authors as the book I recommended to HF (in fact, "He's scared" is their later work), I remember you posted back that it didn't give you any hope. I didn't give you that book recommendation to give you hope however, it was to help you understand the possible reality of your sitch. Glad you found it helpful.
did u get out of ur book that a commitment phob is a type of person that typically has to always be in a R
CPs don't have to be in a relationship, but as people, they desire a great relationship, just like anyone else.
I see this in my W. she wanted her own apt to "have some time" and in reality she is w OM most of the time...almost like she can't stand to be alone...this is why I question if she is a commitment phobe
You're making a causal connection there between her wanting her own place and the fact she's with OM. It could very well be that there are other factors built in to that relationship that make it comfortable for a CP, or just the fact that she *knows* she has her own place she can go to that's enough to make her comfortable, even if she's never there!
