You are right things are out of my control, and I hate that! My W hates me be controlling, and I hate it to!
Maybe I only want to be true to my controlling self and this is why she is doing what she is doing!
Yes, and yes. She needed to see you relax and ease back into things. You seem like you jumped in feet first by taking for granted that you knew what you needed to do to "fix" your marriage. Her reaction; oh God, nothing's changed, did I do the right thing? I realized VERY early on, actually the day before my first counseling session, that one of the things that would have to permanently change about me was my controlling nature. Once again, I am not a domineering person. Far from it, as I have self esteem issues as well. My control comes in the form of manipulation of situations so that I can feel comfortable. Well, people don't like to be manipulated, or feel like their lives are being orchestrated by someone else. I think if either of us is to make an impression on our W's, it will be because we finally figure out how (and I have no freakin idea how) to relax and just live life without expectation or control. Have faith. I do....for now...
