Hey Beth. That sounds pretty good. Lawyer meeting may be a little tough, but I bet you feel better after. And as for the guy trying to take you home, who could blame him? Told you you were hot. Your biggest problem will be finding a way to organize the stampede
You sound good. I'm glad. I know you have a lot ahead to face and I am thinking about you and hoping everything goes as smoothly as it possibly can. It's good to hear you doing things like going out with your SIL! Just wanted to send you my support! Hope
Most of us really marry only once. First love endures, even unto our dying day. And we never really divorce.
Yep Kismet, I'm still soldiering around. Just doing the daily things to keep the household running.
I wanted to post this for all you DB men out there. I talked with a woman who had an affair. Very interesting conversation. She told me that she knew the relationship wouldn't work. That he wasn't the guy for her. Yet, she couldn't get enough. It was addictive. He told her things that her H had never told her. Held her, stroked her hair, told her how beautiful and special she was. You can see how someone can get wrapped up in the infatuation and addictive "high" that this creates. She ended the A and they haven't had any contact for several months. She did say though that she would go back in a minute if he called. Even though she knows it wouldn't work and it was so wrong. Just lets you know how addictive the A is. And how someone can get completely caught up and lose sight of the real world. Because you are in fantasy land. And while it lasts, fantasy land is bliss.
I can see now how my H has decided to walk out. Although the A has lasted a long time, there has never been the day to day drudgery. It is still fantasy. It will become the day to day monotony one day, and maybe only then will he know just what he gave up. But I am ready to move on. It's time.
I'm going to start a new thread on the Surviving the Big D forum. I don't want to discourage any of you still fighting hard to save your M. Please don't stop. You will know when it is time to move on. I can honestly say to myself that I did everything I could to save my M. I have no regrets. That makes going forward SO much easier.
So keep DBing! You might not save your marriage, but you will definitely save yourself!
WCB
P.S. - I'll keep posting here til I lock up!
God grant me the serenity,
to accept the things I cannot change,
To change the things I can,
And the wisdom to know the difference.
- Reinhold Niebuhr
Windy, sorry to hear that you're feeling down...I hope I have not started anything on here...it seems like we are all getting fed up about the same time...I am going to the "D but not done" BB because I feel that even if I dont get my W back...I think it will be good for myself to continue the DBering effort. Your thoughts?
I think that is what will work best for me. I have learned through all this that the only thing I can control is myself. And DBing has taught me so much about myself and how I interact with others. I have found myself again and that is so wonderful. So, I may not save my M but I saved myself. And I will need to keep DBing into the future. It will be useful in all of my future relationships. Hope this helps you...
WCB
God grant me the serenity,
to accept the things I cannot change,
To change the things I can,
And the wisdom to know the difference.
- Reinhold Niebuhr
In the words of Henry Higgins in the movie "My Fair Lady" "I think she's got it, by jove I think she's got it." Congratulations. I've traveled that same road and it's a tough row to hoe but you've described the destination perectly. Who knows waht the future will bring but it sounds to me you're better prepared for whatever happens.
Thanks so much! That really meant alot to me! For so much of my journey I felt as though I did and was doing everything wrong. In reality, I was doing most everything right. Thanks for reminding me of that!
WCB
God grant me the serenity,
to accept the things I cannot change,
To change the things I can,
And the wisdom to know the difference.
- Reinhold Niebuhr
No truer words Beth you just remember them. I am thinking of moving to the Piecing Forum but don't know if I should as what if we stop piecing. Will look you up at your new home....Kim
