Hi Beth: I just found your post and can really empathize with you. My H isn't interested in building a new relationship with me either. Been together 20 yrs, married 18 1/2 with 4 kids. I'm 3 months into this and he's adamant he want a D. We told our kids the first week in Jan that we were separating (he continues to live here, but in our daughter's room downstairs d/t financial issues. I refused to move our kids out of their home and to keep it, he needs to stay). I've been DBing, detaching, working on myself, going out with friends. And yes, he still asks me where I've been and with whom. He even changed the oil on my van last weekend! Even after I told him not to do it, I would take it to Jiffy Lube. Its very frustrating to know where you stand. I find the emotional up and down very tiring. Sounds to me like you are doing fine. Good luck, Lynn
