I need advice from any DBer's that know about this sitch. A short history of us. I'll spare the details. M 34 W 33 M 9 1/2 years together 17 years No children Separated Oct 20 2006 D filed last Friday
Ok so W amended separation to D this past Friday. She said she did this because I made her mad. Sounds like an excuse to me. Anyway, I think there is EA or PA but have no proof.
My question is she called me this afternoon to tell me something. When I could tell we were almost through talking I asked her how she was doing. She said ok and I asked if she was sure she wanted to do this. She responds she doesn't know but doesn't want M to be like it was. She is very confused and has been since the separation. I figured she just confused b/c she just filed but after talking for a while I really believe she is confused. Did I mention she abuses prescription drugs? That probably has a lot to do with it too. All she says is she guesses she wants to be alone. Who wants to live alone? She doesn't have many friends. It seem that she is depressed and has been for a long time. Possibly a year. I've accepted the D but deep down don't want one. I don't know what I should do. I was thinking of writing a letter to her giving he options on what we could do to salvage the M. I was thinking of asking her to visit with a pastor at my church which I started going to after the separation. I know from the DB'in books that we're supposed to leave them alone but since the separation I've had barely any contact. So she hasn't seen any of the changes I've made.
I feel like I actually have an opportunity to do something. This is the first sign she shown me at all. Or is it? Is she just confused b/c of the sitch? Should I sit back like I have and watch my M end. I did give her space and that didn't work at all.
Any advice from someone is much appreciated. I want to work this out.
