WAW (37) and my sister's H (55) have been in EA for 2+ yrs and PA for 1 yr. The end of Oct05, W unexpectantly moves out leaving me and our 2 D's. At the same time my sister's H tells her he wants a D because he's 'in love' with another women. That other women is my W. Two weekd before all this, my Dad (92) dies.
So W and OM/BIL are now living together 75% of the time at his house since he kicked my sister out. My sister and I are going through the same thing at the same time - the difference is he kicked my sister out while my W moved out. Sounds like something you'd see on a soap opera, doesn't it? Trust me, its a real nightmare you wish you could wake up from but you realize you can't its real and its happening to you.
WAW doesn't call or communicate with me at all and won't return any attempt by me to communicate. So I've been forced to go dark and completely detach - not as though I had a choice though. Talk about a helpless and hopeless situation.
WAW and OM/BIF have not just burned bridges with family and friends, they've completely blown them up! I guess they figured the loss/rejection of family and friends is worth them being together. They each obviously have a serious co-dependency problem and wouldn't surprise me if their both MI (mentally ill).
OM/BIL M to my sister is his 2nd (11 yrs). His 1st ended in a PA as well and he's cheated at least once on my sister. So I figure my W is at least #5 on his list of women. I have nothing but pity and disgust for both of them. Let them have their life together. How can it last when all they have in life is each other? He'll cheat on her to when he gets tired of her. Its just a matter of time. And who will be there to pick up the pieces of her life? Me? Can I wait that long? Should I wait that long?
Its taken me about 6 weeks to really start detaching with good success. Hey, W wanted out of our M sooo bad let her have the life she wants. Let the two of them ruin their lives together. She/they aren't going to ruin mine! My feelings of anger, resentment and even hatred are slowly subsiding. I pray at some point, some day, I'll be able to forgive her/him for the damage done to myself, my mom, my sister and my 2 D's. In DR, Michele talks about 'Forgiveness is a gift you give yourself' - HOW TRUE! Its a matter of exercising the principle on a daily basis.
Right now, my sister's divorce should happen Feb06. After that happens, OM/ex-BIL WILL force WAW to D me. So in the meantime, I'm just waiting for the other shoe to drop...
Any thoughts on this completely messed up mess?? Thanks for your prayers, you are all in mine. God will carry us through.
