I will interject something here: yes, I was moody and emotional. Always have been and she married me anyway. What does that say? She has issues? I think my wife would say the same thing mamabear. She would tell me that while I have (actually she did tell me this) faults, they are not bad enough to have caused her to do this. She did it because she needs to make her own decisions, for herself and this A is the first thing she feels she has done that is purely for her own good. In a way, she (and many other cheaters/WAS/MLCers) seems to be DBing her way out of her marriage. She sure as hell is focusing on herself and making the decisions she needs to make to be happy, for the moment. She is detaching and going dark and all that happy stuff. Certainly being a cheating bi*ch is a 180 from the loving wife and mother that I knew. She's probably even considering a LRT like filing for divorce in hopes that I will agree and let her go. So, I think one other reason we find it hard to do this DBing stuff is that it seems like it's really just doing to them what they did to us without an affair and we are not in a position where we feel ok with that. I want my wife back more than anything in the universe. I understand her decisions but I also understand that it CAN work. Like you mama, I am all for DBing and that stuff but my goal (I know, slap me) is to get her back and I want to do whatever it takes!
