I was in the Military. I remember quite well the rules and regulations. They are called the Uniform Code of Military Justice. If I remember correctly, adultry is a crime punishable under the UCMJ. I would speak to the JAG, and get his opinion on the affair situation. If the OM is an officer, the punishment is usually much worse than if he were enlisted, or an NCO.
I saw infidelity a million times in the military if I saw it once. It is disgusting, and deplorable. I share your situation, and I feel your pain. Good luck.
