The sad thing about your situation to me is that because you are dealing with NPD there is a real possibility that NOTHING you do will have an affect on your W to actually do something about the situation, to improve it.....whether that be you getting rid of the dogs, or moving out (whether that's you or her moving). Narcissists are wrapped up in me, me, me, me, me. Remember...Narcassis is the one who fell in love with his own reflection.
What I hear you saying, is something I've heard some of the abused ladies I've known say. "I know I need to do xyz...but I'm just not ready to do that YET." They know at some point they will get there, but they aren't there yet. I've been there myself, at some point you simply do reach your breaking point and are ready to take action. Zbube, that's ok. It does take mental preparation to do tough things, sometimes there can be a catalyst to speed things up....but IMPO when you are battling with some of the things you hold dear...loyalty, duty, honor etc...it can make things more difficult when it comes to becoming mentally prepared to take those tough steps.
I'm sure it's tough to hear what some of us have to say on here about your sitch. Unfortunately though sometimes we have to do things we don't want to do, things that are tough, to protect ourselves and those we love (your daughters). Talk to your C though, see what he has to say...tell him what you're thinking and see what his suggestions are.
