QUOTE ____________________________________________________________ If you bring this up, and she answers it...accept it, move on. Don't dwell on this, don't 2nd guess her answers. There are other issues you two need to concentrate on that are more pressing than what she wears to bed. ____________________________________________________________
This is great advice - I totally agree. Thank you!
Lass, I looooooooved that cashmere set from red envelope!
They had a lot of interesting Valentine's day ideas in that catalog. I left it out for about 3 days hoping H would browse through it but no luck. I briefly felt a flicker of "dammit why can't I ever get anything for valentine's day that I would WANT" but, you know, I'm adjusting to the fact that in some respects I will never feel satisfied with what MrHP provides, romantically speaking.
That's life, right. I'm not a perfect wife either, who unequivocally meets every need of his, despite what I may have written in a fit of resentment-fueled emotion.
OK. You ladies have gotten me interested in red envelope now. I'm going to check it out.
Any thoughts on the two things I linked to earlier in this thread? The reviews on the Iam book sounded really good. The PJ set just caught my eye as I was browsing through amazon.
"Recollect me darlin, raise me to your lips, two undernourished egos, four rotating hips"
Sorry, no input from me on the gifts....I can't get to those links here from the office....and didn't have a chance to hop online last night and check them out. Red Envolope does have some great gift ideas though.
Every now and then my H and I will thumb through catalogs like that....he'll ask me if I like certain things...and I will point out things I really like. Lets face it....it does take effort to really get to know someone's "style"...and at least he's making that effort.
I think my H would always take what I would call the easy road out (take me shopping) because #1 he wanted to make sure I'd get something I'd like, and #2 in his past experiences nothing he bought for women was good enough (so fear I would't like it). I believe though I've finally gotten him to trust that when I say to him....that for me, it's really not the "gift", it's the thought and the effort behind the gift that means something to me. I told him last night, he could sit down and hand make me a card that cost him nothing....and that would mean more to me than jewelry, flowers, or anything else. Not that I'd turn the other things down mind you LOL, but they definitely wouldn't mean as much as the effort put into something like a hand made card (for me anyway).
Oh & Honeypot....that was a great cashmere set wasn't it? I actually did really like it myself...if H bought me that, I'd certainly wear it.
No problem. I've just never bought anything like that before for the wife. The book is called "The Sex Diet" and it is all about learning and developing your sensuality as well as sexuality. The reviews on amazon were in general very good, which I know you can't always trust, but the comments about the book seemed to be what I'm looking for. Lots of exercises that help you develop as sense of your own sexuality. I guess I was just a little worried how she might take it. The other gift was a pink nightshirt (button down) and pink boxers that have kiss prints all over them. It looks sexy, but she can cover up her stomach with the shirt if she is feeling self-conscious. Plus it is machine washable
"Recollect me darlin, raise me to your lips, two undernourished egos, four rotating hips"
"Chrome, I looked at the pajamas you picked out and I thought they were cute. My H would never consider them "sexy"."
Really?!? I guess I feel really horny now. I didn't want to go with anything sheer or revealing a lot of skin so soon after the pregnancy. Like I said, doesn't bother me, I just want her to be comfortable, and her wearing something like that would get me going, so best of both worlds, kwim? I am curious though what your H would find sexy. Merry widow (sp?)? Something completely see-through?
"Sometimes reading this board creates resentment in me that otherwise would not have been there. This is something I need to work on!!!"
Definitely! I don't know how many times I have felt strong pangs of jealously when I read to what lengths you ladies go to attract your H's. I have to remind myself of the history and reasons why my W does the things she does, that it isn't a "her fault" issue, but a combination of many things. Plus, it gives me something to look forward to. I think I will appreciate her initiating more because of our history than I would if it had happened all along. Of course, I would have appreciated it all along too.
"Recollect me darlin, raise me to your lips, two undernourished egos, four rotating hips"
H would pooh pooh it, so it would not go over well in my house, but I say more power to ya!
What would he find sexy. Hmmm, that's a tough one. He has always said No Lingerie, just naked wife. I'm not sure if that's because he truly doesn't like lingerie or because he is insecure and fears that if I wear it, he is supposed to act a "certain" way.
What am I absolutely 100% certain that he finds sexy? Nothing! There is nothing that I do, say, wear or suggest that drives him wild. If he goes 3 days or more without sex, he's horny for me. That's about all I know.
He insists there's not much more than that to his sex drive, so that's what I work with.
If I sound pissy this morning it's my own fault! I had ordered a bunch of things from Victorias Secret and one thing was on back order, wouldn't arrive until months away. This morning I got an email saying that my VS order is being shipped. Silly me, I had forgotten all about the backorder item and foolishly thought that H had gotten over his I hate Vickie's thing and bought me something that I'd actually LIKE for Valentine's day. Then I remembered the backorder item and hopes were dashed. I am feeling ridiculously resentful today so I will talk to him tonight. Doesn't help that last night he was being a rude jackass again and I had to reiterate my boundary from the night before. sheesh, sometimes life is harder than it needs to be!
However, I should say that even on our bad nights we still have fun together and managed to ML anyway.
