Quote: What "backfire", what "effect"? You just said it's for you, so why are you wondering if telling her so will have it lose its "effect" on her and that it appears to be "backfiring"? Hmmmm, methinks you gave away your hand here.
That suggests that you're not really doing it for you, my friend.
No. The fact that I wonder what she'll think does not mean I am doing it TO affect what she thinks. Also, like I said, I am not a club going guy. I don't sip coffee in coffee houses. I play pool, see bands sometimes, and that's about it aside from the usual movies and dinner and such. I am going out to get the hell out of here and breathe. I would also like to have a bit of fun.
Quote: Maybe we can arrange a poker night. I think it would be profitable.
there was one time I felt like a "third wheel" while I was out, so I called it a night. maybe I should've stayed. Why should I make myself uncomfortable when there really was nothing to be uncomfortable about?
"Romantic nights at home" may be what you prefer. What did you use to do before you had anyone to have romantic nights at home with? Maybe I shouldn't ask! Or maybe I can ask, but you shouldn't answer!
Actually, believe it or now, it IS possible to stay home alone, or with friends. It's kinda hard to do that right now when my WAW is home.
Quote: That's some thread! IOW, Hey LBSs, think of what makes you so sad and angry and hurt so you can post it here! Howzabout a thread on "What I Did For Myself That Was Constructive Today!"
Yes, it is quite a thread. I know for me, on that rare occasion when someone posted their feelings in their thread (um, ok, maybe not so rare), it helped me feel like I was not alone. I don't know about you when you went through (or if you're still going through it) this thing, but (doesn't count) I know that feeling alone is one of the main problems I have. Commiserating with other "newbies" about my sitch is extremely helpful in my progress. If it seems unhelpful, well, I don't really know what to say to that. To each his own. If it were as easy as just stepping off the rollercoaster then there would be no need for DB/DR, this site, any other site or therapists to handle these situations.
