Thanks all for the activity on my thread. Each and every one helps. I am feeling much better about the "as if" thing today than ever before. That idea of putting myself in her shoes really started the ball rolling and hearing you guys discuss it more helps too. I hope I can get through the weekend with this attitude intact. I really do. I seem like I am in a good place and I guess compared to where I was a few days ago, I am, but I still feel the constant pain and succumb to it now and again. I want SOOO much to show her that even on a daily basis, that I am a different person, or the old person she fell in love with but I just see my opportunities to do that very limited and it's frustrating! I will try though and my goals for this weekend are (this is new for me): 1) Do not dwell on the OM! 2) If she goes out, don't ask where she's going. 3) Do not bring up the R or OM with W. 4) Act "as if" we are good friends without these issues between us. 5) Try to have fun with the boys and not dwell on W if she's not there. 6) Buy and read DR!!!! 7) Have a revenge affair with a hot chic!!! (just to see if you're paying attention)
Thank you all for really being my closest friends right now. I really have trouble saying that because I generally distrust the internet and people I meet on it but you all have proven yourselves to care more than most of my "real" friends.
