Hi brava! I think my hurt and his guilt are very related. And the more I show my hurt, the further away he goes. He doesn't want to be responsible for it, for me. Even when I was crying about my dog a few weeks ago, and he knew it, he couldn't offer me a shoulder or a hug. I don't get that at all.
I don't think there will ever be a major breakthru. If this all starts heading the right way, it will be litle pieces being glued back in. There will never be a 'please, let's make it right'. It will just be little pieces during the long haul. I hope I don't miss them.
Live your life while you are still living. Riding the trail less traveled.