Sexual overtures? you mean the shower? I don't think he or I consider that sexual, most of the time it's just water saving and time saving, and one of the few times we had to talk. In the morning before work I am on a very tight time schedule, so it was a 'safe' time to ask him to join me. Now, if I would have jumped in his shower over the weekend, and I did have the chance, that could have been mistaken for sexual.

Opti, can I keep it going while feeling the rejection? yes, there's a good chance, I'm pretty thick skinned a lot of times, but I do have limits. It might end up pushing him over the edge and out, and I am afraid of that. But I am afraid of doing nothing too.

A few responses -
Wllowwlk
When was the last time you told him you thought so? Hhmmm, in those exact words? A while. I did tell him he was sexy, I did tell him just yesterday while we were fixing the flat tire on the skidloader how smart he was. Does that count?
People like being with people who help them feel good about themselves. What are you doing to help your H feel good about himself?
Not enough. Right now he is going thru a big deal about getting kicked off a Board of Directors we both have positions on, because of him opposing some new issues. He is pretty much standing alone in his opposition, but once he’s taken a stance he won’t back down. I agree with some of his reasoning, and have stated such to others in charge as to why the new things in proposal are not doing what they had hoped. This is going to be a big deal IMO, if he gets released from his position, and that will flow over to other positions he holds as well. It will definitely affect his PMA, his feeling of position of power. I feel awful about all of it, but not sure what more I can do for him. Other than that, I’ve been saying thanks more for the little things that he does for me. Things he used to do that I could boost on, horses, showing, etc. … I can’t remember the last time he was on a horse, and just once in the last few months that he has been around while I’m riding that I can encourage his great advice. He’s been updating a website with important material for me, I’ve been commenting on that. I need to find more things.

Nicole You said how your H is totally different with you versus when he's around friends/family--could he say the same about you right now? Are you acting just as reserved around him as he is you?
Sometimes, yes. I just get a ‘vibe’ and can’t bring myself to even try and break thru it. Other days I can crack it, at least a little. I thought of this last night. H is usually the one on the phone being happy with the other end. Last night I got some calls about the projects I was working on, and ended up being very chatty and laughing with guy friend on the other end. We had calls back and forth, and H did give me a weird look. Then I realized I was being just like him. I felt bad. A positive I think I’ve noticed is that H will talk on the phone a little more when I am around, such as with kids, etc. But he won’t offer any information, and is usually pretty short answered if I ask.

Hopefulmommy I do is ask my H opinion about something
I try, quite often he won’t comment. And if his frustration is high, it will be like last week and he’ll say what he thinks doesn’t matter. It's hard to draw an opinion from him on day to day stuff. More on this if I remember when I get to finances….

you and your H are living in the same house and are piecing things back together
Well, we’re in the same house. I’m piecing, or trying. H is still here, that tells me that he hasn’t given up 100% or …?? He just hasn’t got something set up for him to go somewhere. We are living as roommates, not husband and wife, not as a married couple. We have joint activities, many social things that we attend together. People still expect that. And one thing I’ve thought about lately is that except for owb!tch, all of his/our friends are married couples. I can’t think of anyone we socialize with regularly that isn’t married. That’s a plus??

I'd love to hear anything you've tried and get suggestions from you.
I’ll get back to you.!

I do have the KLA tapes, listen when I can while driving. My drive time is pretty short, lucky me. One day he 'caught' me listening, didn't ask, but sure looked weird.

I've got more homework yet, but I've run out of time at work! And as I review this, I see that I've really have been dropping the ball, not doing enough of anything! shame on me, and thank you all for pointing it out.

Live your life while you are still living.
Riding the trail less traveled.