You know, one of the things I've learned in all of this is that what you focus on expands. If we choose to focus on our hurt, we hurt more. If we choose to focus on the present, that's all there really is -- the present. If we choose to focus on the past, we miss the present right in front of our very noses.
The best I can do with the discovery is recognize that it's in the past, and there's nothing neither one of us can do about it. But there are tons of things we can both do to make the present better. I'm also at good place with myself and I know if he does it again, it's all about him (he's already admitted that to me).
JRB, you are exactly right. To him, it's old news that he'd rather forget about and move on. I'm trying to do that with him.
