In any dilema in life, dealth, illness, accidents, divorce. The five stages of death and dying often apply. 1. Denial (This can't be real) 2. Anger (Why me? Who can I blame) 3. Bargaining (If he can just wait til the kids leave) 4. Depression (Speaks for itself) 5. Acceptance (Let make the best of it, move on)
As I have spent the past 5 years in my own private hell, wrestling with these issues, trying to make a logical decision about what to do, about 3 years ago, I reached acceptance stage and started to slowly detach from her, emotionally and physically. She was in denial, now is facing the next stage. It can go back and forth, so expect to see all/some of these over and over. I am aware of these feelings, and want to avoid causing her any pain as she goes thru this. I can't help her until she will allow it. So it is painful to watch (and experience the wrath). She has liked her life so far, plenty of money, works part time, has time to enjoy the vacation home, lives near her family. And we have great kids. The perfect life, but , oh yea, my husband has not been happy in a SSM, and has told me over and over again,but I'm not willing (or able)to do anything about it. Maybe angry at herself. Maybe she counted on me never taking any action. Whatever, it's happening now. CD
