Sorry for the delay; I was off Friday and out of town this weekend and I usually don't do much typing on here on weekends anyway. In answer to your question...the detachment at the end was more emotional than anything. It was a change in the way I talked to her and was around her. We saw much less of each other, but I think the longest period of no contact would have been only 3 days or so. The difference was I didn't enquire about her plans, I made my own, and just had more of an attitude of disinterest. It was genuine though, I was at a point where it was more enjoyable to not hear from her. She would still call if I didn't though. She called Thanksgiving and Christmas.
For you Sam my feeling is that if you are talking nightly that both of you are still in the relationship, but it is staying the same because of his addiction. I really don't even know what to suggest, but will take a shot at it. I agree that you can't just put your life on hold waiting for him to get help. It would be almost preferable to proceed with your life as though it is over forever and if he makes the change, fine, maybe you can reconcile.
It really depends on you. If you truly get a life and proceed on your own, he may be gone forever. But the upside is that you will have found out that it is okay. It wasn't meant to be. I think it is fair to give notice to him that you can't keep your life on hold waiting for him and you can't be with him until he's clean. If you are going to talk nightly or every other night I would make it short and be sure you have something else to do. Just my thoughts
Me
In the end, it's not the years in your life that count. It's the life in your years. Abraham Lincoln
It is hard to fail, but it is worse never to have tried to succeed. Theodore Roosevelt
