Something she said...five years ago...let's go back there...coming from a woman that sounds pretty specific to me...sorry I pick up on stuff like that, imagine...can you have the Therapist pick up on that and see where your W was going with it?
As for being financially responsible for her...I can understand how you feel, you are still attached...HOWEVER, if she makes the decision to live on her own, think things through before you make any promises that will be used against you in court. The laws aren't what they used to be...just because she gave birth to the children, doesn't mean that she is the best suited person to be the primary caretaker, and from what you have shared with us so far, I don't see that she is there. But she's emotionally tangled right now, you know her past with the children best.
Example, I sincerely doubt at this point in time that your Ds will want to live with mom. That would put them living with you. In California that would mean (God Bless California!) she would be paying YOU Child Support. Also you would probably keep your residence since you would be the Custodial parent. So, the ball I believe would be in your court.
You are not financially responsible for her unless you have some sort of agreement, document already in place. Offering stuff out of the goodness of your heart is one thing, your choice, make sure you can live with it...even if she was to remarry, still want to pay her health insurance? I didn't think so.
Sorry, just a bit of reality...she's acting on emotion right now and not the reality of the sitch and what she is doing to the family.
