Stig, I agree with Corri. Furthermore, I don't see any reason to hide your identity from her salesman friends. Be proud of who you are and radiate that self assuredness. Do not fear that others will look at you and wonder why you're being dumped--rest assured that they will wonder wtf is wrong with her. Look em straight in the eye and state that you are her husband.
If YOU play her game for her, then it's pretty much more of the same. Show her the new, tougher, wiser you and refuse to protect her from herself.
P.S. No marriage falls apart because of one tirade. Please stop beating yourself up for being human.
