Ive been very quietly fuming over here.

That damn little girl ran away again......

Glad you came to your senses... a little bit.

So your resentment from WAH is overwhelming you. Understandable.

He handed you a lot of power when he said he isnt leaving again. Whatchagonnadowithit?

LFL, I get the feeling you are hugging your H while looking over his shoulder and having your foot holding the door open.

I could go thru and quote you so many times, and show you your fruedian slips and womanese, where you want this to work out. Not gonna do it though.

Your indecision is killing you.

He checked out "the other side" looked around for a while, then decided it wasn't cracked up to be what he thought, and here he comes back to me.

You are not a consolation prize. Thats such a negative attribution and self defeating. Not very confidant either.
He was overwhelmed and needed to escape to his cave. for reasons that you were a part of. Have you figured your part of it out yet? So he needed time to retreat, regroup, and reenergize, this may not be comprehensible to you the way we do it, but it is a very real guy response. Hes just a guy, your just a girl. Both of your reactions have been very typical.

You still have consequences to deal with though. Its not gonna be all fun and smiles.

It's much different on my end when you are forced onto "the other side" and have no resolution about returning.

Not going to commiserate, just acknowledge yes it is.

I could have made it on the other side I think. SO

H didn't/couldn't/wouldn't.

WTH? the reasons are multifacited, but bottom line your H came back. Remember how badly you wanted that before? You are not focused LFL. The seperation is over. Time deal with today, and work on the future.

I think I lost respect for him for both leaving and then returning That's sort of F-ed up but that is how I feel. How can he win with me?

Good question. How can he? ONLY you have control over that. Is your power vindictive, or magnanimous? Are you externally observing (others faults) or internal (yours)

If you use this new found power to belittle, berate and deflate him, verbally or mentally, you will end up back where you were, or worse.

Your mind will believe whatever you repeatedly think about, and tell it. What are you thinking about?

Me? I think I'm incredible attractive. See it works.

You and your H need a game plan. Winging it is not working.