Thanks for checking up on my WCW. I started a post on my thread yesterday, but other things come up and I had to scrap it. So here...I'll try again.
Journaling----
Things with the house are going well. Up until yesterday things were still very stressful because I was trying to complete the application, but couldn't turn it in until H completed, notarized and faxed the power of attorney to the bank, since he won't be around for the closing. I knew he was working on it, but H isn't usually very successful wading through paperwork and bureacracy crap. He gets frustrated so quick and starts complicating things with doubts and procrastination. But he came through on time and got the documents off to the bank. I thanked him for doing it ahead of time and thanked him again when he got it done noting that I knew he had other stuff going on.
Now I have been busting my butt working on this paperwork stuff and jumping through hoops. All while working full time, dealing with chaos at home, and trying to set boundaries with S3 who is really having a tough time lately. Oh, AND being sick with a head cold and stomache flu recently. I felt like I was holding things together with the tips of my fingernails.
Before, I would not have taken the time to thank H for doing the small pieces he had to get done. I would have figured he could atleast get that much done. But, now I'm realizing that NOT thanking him for even the expected things, will only hurt me later.
When I first gave H the list of things he needed to get to the bank he started to get uptight and freak out a bit. His tone on the phone was making my stress sky rocket, and I had S3 screaming at me besides. So I stopped and said "I know you have plenty to do at work. I know this is stressful. Thank you for doing this." And he started to come down and say it was no problem. After I called the bank again it turned out he didn't need 2 of the 4 things I asked him for anyway.
It all reminds me of the course I took at work about the 7 Habits of Highly Effective People. I don't remember much about the program except the analogy that relationships are like checking accounts. Everytime you do something to disappoint or criticisee your partner you make a withdrawal and everytime you do something to build them up you make a deposit. You make withdrawals without even knowing it often times. So you have to keep making deposits everytime you can to keep your balance healthy.
Anyway, H came through and I could finally FedEx off the loan application and I'm pretty much done until the bank calls in a week or so to set up the home inspection. SUCH A HUGE RELIEF to have that out of the way.
H also came through for Christmas. During his Thanksgiving visit I worked up the courage to tell him I wanted to replace my wedding ring for Christmas. I reminded him that when I lost it I had it on a chain around my neck along with the mother and child pendant H had given me.
Then on Christmas eve the postman came to my door and said that he tried to deliver a package the day before but the music was so loud that no one could hear him at the door. That would be my brother home alone while my mom was out and I was grocery shopping. I wanted to stomp on him!
So I had to wait until two days after Christmas for the post office to open up. I opened the package at work and it was the mother and child pendant. I was very happy about that. I didn't even mind that it wasn't the ring. I was hoping it was on back order or something. Then when I talked to H on the phone he said there was another package coming!
I don't know what's harder to believe...that H and I have recovered to the place we are at now, or the fact that H dropped the bomb and all this happened in the first place.
That kind of leaves me to look around at where I/we are now. Suddenly the 19 months until H transfers looks SO far away. I still want to wait until after H gets settled in his next job before S3 and I show up and introduce more change into his life. And there's always the possibility that he may request isolated duty where we can't follow (which he's mentioned before).
But, once I get in the new house I'm hoping the wait won't seem so long. Then next big event is meeting the seller's next Wednesday so they can decide whether or not they want to rent to me for the month before the closing. I'm not confident that they will if they know I have a dog. So, I'm not bringing it up unless they ask. I really hope they don't ask.
During his Thanksgiving visit I worked up the courage to tell him I wanted to replace my wedding ring for Christmas. I reminded him that when I lost it I had it on a chain around my neck along with the mother and child pendant H had given me.
