First off, regarding the night out with "el-train" who I'll refer to as "D", was fine. She's a nice, upbeat woman who's pretty smart too. I see a long distance friendship in the cards. There just wasn't that "click" if you know what I mean. So like I said, I'm sure we'll keep in touch but I just didn't get that...vibe, that you-all-know, that "feeling". That's OK though, one always can use more friends right?
Anyway, on to the News...
So I went to get my manicure today (save the jokes please). I sat down with Jennifer who is the only one I go to. XW also only goes to Jennifer (different days, thank God!) BTW, Jennifer pretty much knows what happened and has in the past given me tidbits about XW (voluntarily, I don't ask). Anyway, the convo goes like this (minus the Vietnamese accent):
J: Is your daughter with you this week? Me: No she's with XW. J: Oh...XW said she's been real busy. Me: (not wanting to be rude) Really? Busy with what? (chuckling) J: She said family and work, busy. Me: Hmmm...
OK FOLKS, ARE YOU SITTING DOWN????
J: You know she got married right? Me: (probably looking kind of pale, but maintaining my cool) No, I did not know that? J: Oh...Uh...yeah. She told me last time she was here. Me: OK J: I noticed she was wearing a wedding ring and I said, "You're wearing your ring?" and she said, "Yes, I got married". I said "Oh, when?" and she said, "In August". Me: Oh... J: Your daughter didn't tell you? Me: No, no she didn't. J: Ohhhh...
So needless to say, I couldn't even concentrate on my magazine during the manicure. I almost got up to excuse myself and finish it at another time but she had already started and I didn't want to make her feel bad either.
So, there you have it. For old times sake, let's take another look at the time line in my XW's decision making process:
6/28/04: 20-year HS Reunion, run into soon-to-be OP. 8/28/04: Tells me she wants to move out. Comes clean about PA (not sex though). We decide on counselling and she breaks it off with him. (Not really as it turns out) 12/05/04: She says no more counselling and she's "done trying and this isn't working". 12/14/04: Calls my cell on my way to work, "I'm done. I want to file" 12/22/04: Filing date. Stays living here until March, still seeing the OP while lying about it to me and D13 (then 12) 3/05/05: Moves out and into her Condo Early 4/05: Moves OP into Condo 7/04/05: Our Divorce is Final. 8/10/05: OP's Divorce is Final. 8/05: THE TWO OF THEM GET MARRIED!!!
Now THAT'S what I call quality decision making!!
So also I'm thinking--Why hasn't D13 said anything about any of this to me? Was she just going to keep this a big secret? I'm not pissed at her, she's a little girl, but Jeez, I'm just left in the dark on this. I have to hear it from the lady that works at the nail place?
So here I sit on a Saturday night contemplating, thinking... All that talk from my friends, my Counselor, all the books I read. They say that XW's depressed and unhappy, etc, etc. Well obviously not. She's happily remarried with her new dysfunctional family jammed into that Condo. 39-years-old, on her 3rd marriage, to a guy she met 14 months before, while SHE was married. And this to a guy who was married as well, who left his wife and two kids.
While I'm sure it isn't healthy, a part of me hopes the both of them rot in Hell!! (There, I said it!) I worry that D13 looks at her Mom and sees that as "normal". It's OK to walk away from your husband and family for some "new guy" and move from married to separated to divorced to re-married in a span of 6 months.
So that's it for now. A nice piece of Broiled Mahi Mahi with some Brown Rice and Spinach Salad for dinner and I sit here and write out my feelings on a computer with a glass of White Wine and the Lakers v. Clippers on the tube in the background.
