Hey, SS!

Not only do I feel like an idiot considering just about everyone knew except me, but it makes me question what kind of reporter I've been.

Now you listen here, dear. I'm not one to boast, but of the four awards I've received in reporting, two have been because of investigative work. The other two were service awards because of the consequences of that investigative work.

And *I* was apparently the last to know about H's A, too. People on these boards -- probably due mainly to their experiences -- knew before I knew. I mean, I never disputed the possibility of him having one; I'd never ruin my credibility like that. But I didn't have factual evidence, and I don't attach my emotions to speculation or hearsay.

It took me literally walking in on my H in bed with OW before I knew the A was going on. Of course, he had already left me, so I'm amazed that I even figured it out then.

The point is that being the last person to know about your H's A has absolutely nothing to do with you, either personally or professionally. What it tells me is that you trusted your H. And, as NYS pointed out, it tells me that your H knows you're not an idiot, and that's why he was especially careful with his "evidence."

Now don't get me wrong. I've thought the same thing about myself: If I'm so good at investigating things, why didn't I know about this? If I'm such a perceptive person, why didn't I figure this out?

The possible answers are plenty, but they all boil down to one basic fact: We trusted our Hs. And that's nothing to beat yourself up over.